Of commercialization of love and Valentine’s Day becoming a formality

LOVE is in the air once again as many people will tomorrow get a chance to rekindle their love. The day has been reserved for love. It is that time of the year again when those in love, the Romeos and Juliets, try to prove to their loved ones that they do not only love with their hearts but with their pockets as well.

The traditional red colour, symbolizing love, will most likely dominant in the streets as all those who believe in the day try to show that at least they have someone to love or who loves them.

It is that day of the year once again when many people’s pockets are left perforated because they would have pumped out a lot of money in the name of Valentine's gift. It never ceases to amaze me how some people go to the extremes to show their love. In most cases, they want this day to be memorable, so to achieve that they have to do something beyond their ordinary lives.

Needless to mention that some of the antics backfire and instead of cementing the relationship, the day marks the end of it. In one of the past commemorations, an Austrian 'Romeo' burnt the house down after making a giant heart out of blazing candles.

Hannes Pisek, 20, from Hoenigsberg in the province of Styria, used 220 candles to make a huge heart on the floor of his flat. He then lit them and went to pick up his girlfriend from work - but the plan backfired when the flat caught fire.

Pisek was left out in the cold as firemen battled to bring the blaze under control. He has now lost his home and his girlfriend - she left him afterwards and has moved back with her parents.

Many other crazy stories and adventures are often heard especially on how people spend the day. Dubbed the biggest retail scam in history, it is a day the calendar says we have to show love as if we don't the rest of the year.

Valentine's Day generates an estimated $14.7bn (£9.2bn) in retail sales in the United States while an estimated 1 billion St Valentine's Day cards are sent worldwide, making it the second most card-heavy celebration after Christmas.

The day has been commercialized to an extent that many businessmen smile their way to the bank after lovebirds in the name of love, recklessly spend their hard earned cash to please one another. You needed to visit recreational facilities such as beaches, hotels, restaurants and so on to prove what I am talking about. If you missed it this year, then do not worry, you will have another chance to see it next time.

This is a day that is devoted to relationships and the love that is shared between two or more individuals. But, what the day usually ends up doing is forcing men and women to spend ridiculous amounts of time and money on getting the perfect gift for their partners. Many relationships have been strained because an expectant lover would have been left in the cold, after the expected Valentine’s gift remained just but a dream.

On the other hand it was a difficult day for those who are single, whether by design or default. I am referring to those who, during that day, had no lover, maybe after being dumped or after getting divorced.

I know seeing other people loving each other might have brought back painful memories to these people but I believe it was better off staying out of it rather than pretending. Today’s love has not only been commercialized but has been artificialised as well. What we referred to as true love sometime back is almost non existent as many people weigh gains against losses before embarking into a relationship.

This is the reason many relationships die a sudden death or end prematurely because the uniting factor is not love but something else. Today’s love is now fragile to such an extent that a small quarrel is blown out of proportion and is branded irreconcilable differences.

This year’s love celebrations come at a time when the institution of marriage is under siege. Marriage is fast becoming an endangered species not only in Bongoland but the world over. A lot of money is spent on marriages but most of them will be marriages of convenience. Someone will be having something to gain out of this marriage rendering the marriages fragile.

The “till death do us part” vows on the alter are fast becoming just but insincere formalities or just mere meaningless requirements of a wedding ceremony. What a shame!

Many children are left in the cold, to pay for the sins of their parents, who married for the wrong reasons only to realize that they don’t love each other when it is already too late. If today's rates of divorce are anything to go by, then this country will be reduced to a mere jungle as the institution of marriage is approaching extinction. Just imagine a world without marriages but cohabitation and prostitution.

It is vital for everyone to remember that love is not love until you give it away and that not even a single shilling or dollar can buy love. God bless you.

bongoblast@thisday.co.tz